Tuesday, April 26, 2011

The Beast: Part 12

Whew. Do you need to breathe? Have you caught up on all my stories? It's really crucial at this point that you've read all eleven previous posts before you read on. You can't "get it" without doing that. OK? Ok. So here ya go: Read up.

1           7
          8
3           9
4          10
5          11
Ms Idiocy
More Ms. Idiocy
 6

For those of you who have done your homework, you can now read on.

I went home after the meeting and typed my resignation. As much as it killed me, I took great joy in typing it out. I wrote between the lines. I made allusions without direct name-calling. I showed off my writing skills. Most of all, I maintained my integrity, and was satisfied with the last piece of my documentation folder.

This is what it said:

To Whom it May Concern-

At this time I find myself in a place I never thought I would be.  Let me first say that I love the Hell R-IX School District.  As a whole, it is a great place to be.  This is a wonderful community.  It is my home, it is where my family has roots, and it is where I plan to spend the best years of my life.

However, at this time I am unable to continue working at Hell High School.  Teaching young people is truly my passion, but I have found myself in a situation this year that is unacceptable to me as a young teacher.  I feel it is best for me to find a place where I can grow and learn.

I have tried my best to work with the administration and collaborate with my colleagues.  I have put forth every effort to maintain a PLC attitude, but I find, at this time, there is no way I can work past the events that have shaped this year.  It has truly been a trying year.  There are many things I could say at this point, but I choose to maintain my integrity and character.

Please accept this as my formal resignation from employment at Hell High School effective at the close of my 2007/2008 contract.

Sincerely,
Andrea Lastname

I was on a mission to make sure I was the first one. I didn't want teachers whispering about me behind my back. I didn't want students hearing I was "let go." I was in the mindset of needing to have proof of my actions, so I posted the resignation on my blog (at that time...not this one..one to which students did not have access) with this note:

This is a copy of the letter I submitted today.  Just so you all know and understand it was MY choice, MY decision, not Its.  This is all directly related to Beastly Beast and the way It has treated me this year.  When my time is up at Hell I will elaborate more.

I was not mentally prepared to tell the students about my decsion, but I knew I had to do it. I had to be first. I made several copies of my resignation letter that morning before school. I turned in one to The Beast, and the rest I kept in my classroom.

All I remember about those conversations was that I tried to be very vague on my reasoning. Obviously the letter itself gave some suggestions, but the kids were confused. They wanted to know WHY. Was I taking another job? No. Was I moving? No. Then WHY?

I just told them it wasn't working out and that I felt I needed to move on. I promised I would elaborate more after the board accepted my resignation. That was on Tuesday.

On Thursday I left early, and I didn't return until the following Monday. I don't know now why. I may have actually been sick, or I may have just been using my days to ease my poor mental exhaustion. Or Chloe may have been sick. All I know is that I have absent reports for Thursday and Friday that state "Sick leave for self." I didn't go into any reasoning, because what were they going to do? Fire me? That was going to become my complete mindset for the remaining months.

That is an important factor, because what happened while I was gone those two days is really what changed the course of this story. If not for those two absent days, I would likely write one more post about the last days in Hell and be done. However, these days gave more to the story.

So much more, they lead to another post...which leads to another, and another. And those, my friends, are for another day.

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