Monday, October 11, 2010

Apron Strings: Ordering Food

Happy Monday, friends! I have enjoyed my weekend with family so very much! I didn't work at all this weekend, but don't you worry. I have plenty of material to keep my Monday mini blog going!  With no further ado, let's get to the meat. Literally. Today we're talking about food content (not quality).

So we are going to assume that it's not your birthday, and you didn't order a bar drink. Or, if you ordered a bar drink, it got to you in a timely fashion and you still love me :) Now it's time for the good stuff. It's time to order your food.

Appetizers
There's a common misconception that if you order an appetizer your food will take longer. That may be true by a minute to five minutes, but no longer. Those computers we use are pretty smart :) They send your appetizer back to the kitchen, then give it about five minutes to get cooked before they send your food back. Or, if the kitchen finishes your appetizer before that time, the food will automatically go back. Then you have a yummy snack to occupy you while you wait.

2 for 20
You all love it. You get to split an appetizer and you each get an entree. It's a heckuva deal.

What you don't know:
*Check the prices!
If you're really into getting more for your money, check the prices on the individual plates. A chicken basket is under 9.00. A steak is 12ish. So if you both get steak, you're getting a much better deal for your same 20.00 bill.  Especially check the appetizers. I cringe when guests do a two for twenty and order queso blanco as the appetizer. It's two bucks, guys. TWO dollars! Spinach dip is somewhere around seven, and boneless wings are almost nine. So why not go all out? It's all the same price for you.

*I'm going to offer you upgrades.
You can get a bigger steak for 2.00, you can load your potatoes for a little over a dollar. You can substitute onion rings for a dollar. You can 86(get rid of) that ugly broccoli tree and substitute a house salad (which at Applebees is on a full-size plate) for a dollar. You can add sauteed mushrooms or shrimp and parmesean to the top of your steak.  The list goes on. A lot of people get aggravated, thinking I am just trying to get them to spend more money. But the truth is, any or all of these things are good additions to your meal, and a lot of people don't know we have them. So don't get mad at me. I'm just doing my job. All you have to do is say no, thanks.

Dessert
You've had a lovely meal and now it's time to decide if you want dessert.

Things you don't know:
*Don't take all day to decide.
You either want it or you don't. If you tell me "maybe," then I'm not bringing your check until I know for sure, because it will have to be modified if you order. If you don't want dessert, that's fine, I don't care, but don't string me along, making me check back with you four times (it really happens). Either yes or no.

*All desserts are not created equal.
Any warm dessert is going to take a lot longer than a cold dessert. And remember, a shake or a specialty drink of any kind comes from the bar, so I have no control over that. An ice cream sundae or any of the Applebees "shooters" are made by your server, so they're sure to be timely, and they're always good :)

*I need to know how many plates/spoons.
If you order the triple chocolate meltdown, which is large enough to share, don't just expect me to bring you two spoons. Because, what if it was just for you? Wouldn't you feel offended if I assumed there was no way only YOU were eating that, and brought you two spoons? I have to look ahead to every possible scenario of making you angry. So if you want two spoons, please ask. THEN if I forget you can scold me.

There is much much more to tell you about food. We need to talk about food quality and modifications, but I think I'll save those for another day.  Have a good Monday :)

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